What Are We Teaching Our Student-Athletes?

Recently, one of the communities in our area went through some changes in their respective high school basketball programs. The boy’s varsity basketball program had four members of the team quit after having completed just eight games of a 20 game season.
A few days after that, the junior varsity girls coach quit as well.
Both teams had people quit for different reasons, but what really bothers me is that the parents of these student-athletes allowed this type of behavior to happen.
First off all, let me say that I do not condone the fact that the junior varsity coach quit on his players in mid-season. In fact, I think making a commitment to a team and keeping that commitment is a true sign of one’s character. Although after hearing the following explanation from the coach, I have to say that I can understand the coach’s reasoning for making his decision.
After a recent game, the coach was giving a post game talk to the team when one of the player’s parents came into the locker-room and started to scream at the coach in front the young ladies. The coach dismissed his team, and the ‘discussion’ lasted until half-time of the varsity game.
The next day, I was informed that the coach had quit stating, “I just cannot take the parents anymore.”
Obviously, this was not the first time something like this had happened.
Later in the same week, the boy’s varsity team had their unexpected departures. After making a commitment to not only their teammates, but their coach, these four players quit. After practicing all summer and almost non-stop since mid-November, these players quit on their team. The players quit for two reasons: one, because they were not happy with their playing time, and two, because the coach was pushing them hard in practices to be better defensive players.
The ex-players may have different versions, but all my sources tell me the same story.
My question has to be, why are area parents allowing this type of behavior to be displayed by their children? What lessons are we teaching our student-athletes if we behave like the ‘so-called’ parent in the case of the junior varsity situation?
Well, lesson number one in the above situation obviously was that if you are upset with someone then you should barge in on that person and start screaming at them. No matter where you are, or what you are doing, just start screaming at someone who makes you angry. With a parent like that, it’s no wonder the kid thinks it’s all right to quit on your teammates.
In the second example, the lesson that was taught was to just quit something that you do not agree with, even though you made a commitment to something bigger than yourself. Just go ahead and quit! Who cares! Because the individual is always more important than the team
Do people think that these are the lessons that should be taught to our young adults?
I sincerely hope not.
As a parent myself, I can’t possibly imagine what would cause another parent to react like the screamer in the first situation. One thing that bothers me is how many parents are moonstruck with the idea that a full college scholarship is within the grasp of their son or daughter. And that the only thing holding back the realization of that dream is the coach of the high school team that their kid plays on.
Look at the facts. The fact is that less than four percent of all high school athletes compete on the collegiate level, and even less receives any scholarship money to play. Now, this should not be meant to discourage anyone from trying to get a college scholarship. I’m just relaying the facts.
Contrary to some opinions, coaches are not out to get anyone. They are here to teach lessons about the game and hopefully teach the kids a little about life. Everyday lessons such as how to act when things don’t always go your way. You know, life lessons that every adult seems to have to deal with on a daily basis.
Quitting on your teammates should never be tolerated. If you decide not to compete the following year, that is one thing. You should never quit on your team. Yes you may have disagreements with your coach, but they are the coach and, like it or not, their decision stands. You made the commitment, live up to it.
That is the lesson the parents should be teaching their children.
Youths can learn a lot from sports. They learn how to be a good person, a good teammate, and most of all how to work hard toward a goal. Parents just need to let the kids play ball and let the coaches teach. Encourage them and give them support. Act like an adult and a parent, and your children will be better for it in the long-run.